Buster's Uncle

Cheer me up...

749 posts in this topic

I've got a RL thing that's really bringing me down. I don't like being taken for granted, and I REALLY hate being reminded that people don't love me back. I've had to make a very hard decision.

 

This has been going on for days, and I don't know what's brought it to the forefront this evening, but for the last couple of hours I've been feeling really blue. My eyes have been watering spontaneously. It's been a bad evening for me to be bored.

 

So, I thought I'd open myself up to more rejection and humiliation by calling upon you, my imaginary innerwebs friends to come to my aid. I love you guys.

 

I don't know that I need advice, but I sure could use a hand.

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I'd recommend some good comedy of some sort to get your mind off sadness.

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Buncle,

 

FWIW, you rock.

 

Wife's out of town so I'll be popping in all night.

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It's worth a lot to me, actually.

 

Hopefully, I'll pass out and go to bed in about an hour.

 

-Hopefully, not in that order.

 

 

p.s. You forgot :broc:

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Care to be more specific with what's going on?

 

I do have a BA in Psychology gathering dust on the wall.

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Care to be more specific with what's going on?

 

I do have a BA in Psychology gathering dust on the wall.

Oh, my other main hobby is running a chess club. We've just moved to a new meeting place in a library, and -you gotta remember that I'm more than half deaf- I can't hear well enough to socialize with my chess cronies while they, and I, have to be so quiet. I suck at the actual chess, and hanging with the people is all I've been getting back from it for a long time.

 

I left the meeting very early, something I've never done before, and talking about quitting as I went. No one has tried to contact me since Tuesday, and I'm pretty hurt by that.

 

-And there are a lot of issues in the mix about all the work I do for that club; it used to be my entire LIFE, socially, and the thing I did that I cared about doing. But my heart hasn't been in the work for about a year, it's been a chore and a source of stress for a long time, and I see the only aspect I was still getting out of it ruined. I'm hurt and yeah, angry, and my mind keeps dredging up a million old grievances and frustrations.

 

Last night, I realized something important; every time I thought about not having my Monday and Tuesday duties hanging over my head, I felt relieved. And then I knew it was really over.

 

That club may very well die without me, and I hate that, but I have to take care of me- they won't do it for me.

 

This is like breaking up with a girlfriend. It's just so very, very hard. I'm going to be okay eventually, but it's hard, and the corner of my left eye is damp as I type. I just don't want to be alone right now.

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Something my dad always talks about is mental energy.

 

It's like cash, you can spend it however you want, sometimes you need to spend it on certain important/necessary things at the expense of other things. Ideally you spend it on something that creates MORE energy for you.

 

So using your example of being relieved when you "thought about not having my Monday and Tuesday duties hanging over my head":

 

1. You are telling yourself that your energy is better spent doing something else.

2. You used to gain mental energy from this group because it was worth your energy investment in the past.

3. "hanging with the people is all I've been getting back from it" I am guessing you were getting a social fix in this case.

 

Are the other people there more for games and I'm-better-than-you status? That could hinder the social aspect of such a group.

Are there certain people who no longer attend that you enjoyed interacting with in the past?

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Sounds to me like you're in a mega-rut. :(

 

Anyway you can get out for an adventure... a few days at the beach, in the mountains, etc.? We here need you, of course, but you need a change of scenery. You need to flush the cobwebs outta your brain, drink in some sunshine [or some snowy wonderland].

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If I were in your situation, I would write a letter (not email, letter's are personal) to your five fav people from the club. People love honesty, so just simply tell them the truth. Joke at your chess skills and say it's for the company of them that you enjoy the club. Then explain that due to the move and your hearing you're having trouble with the be quiet rule. Then offer to host just them at your place say once a fortnight. Have a good chat, movie or play chess. Make it after dinner so no one has to worry about food. Just have some nibblies, hot coffees and old fashioned chatting around the table. If a couple games of chess, or cards even come out of it that's all the better.

 

EDIT: We do this on Friday nights. We have an extended family deep fried fish 'n chip night. We just change locations, but it's still the same great fish 'n chips, a couple drinks, chatting and fun. The kids all have fun too as they get to see each other and play.

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You'd be surprised at what normal and congenial people we have in the club; I was when I joined. I expected a roomful of spazbos, and no, the only one who ever gloated over me much was one of my closest friends in the club and I didn't mind.

 

There ARE people I've been missing at meetings.

 

...

 

Sure, I'm in a rut. The thing that occurs to me is to go visit with my sister in Texas for a few weeks- there's been some loose talk about me it doing it, anyway- and as a plus, I have a lunch date with Sloww when I do. I'm curious to find proof that any of you are real- also curious as to whether Sloww will try to punch me out.

 

I think I'll move that trip up to high priority.

 

...

 

-I'm deliberately following Hickory Chess Club practice in not contacting anyone. That's what they've done to me for years- one of the reasons I'm quitting- quid pro quo.

 

These are friends, but not really close friends. I honestly don't even care for having family who don't live here in the house for long. One guest at a time I can handle, but this is my hermit's cave, and the notion of entertaining just doesn't have a lot of appeal.

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Call up the people you like, offer to buy the first round, and find a quiet dive bar to hang out in.

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So' date=' I thought I'd open myself up to more rejection and humiliation by calling upon you, my imaginary innerwebs friends to come to my aid. I love you guys. [/quote']

 

 

You suck.

 

Does that help?

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You know? Actually, I'm in a sorry enough mood to not feel like being a good sport about it, so no.

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This show used to cheer me up when I was little

 

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Ou0L6UZ5qI]YouTube- Snap Yo Fraggles[/ame]

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Ah, I'm sure he didn't mean anything by it. Just trying to cheer you up. About us being imaginary... I assure you that I am a flesh-and-blood human being. I can relate to your hermit cave, btw, a coworker brought up the fact that I'm something of a recluse. He's right. Almost every time I've had anyone over, I've felt the need to apologize repeatedly over the state of the place. I'm not a very neat and tidy type of person, and I don't like having company often.

 

If you're ever gonna be in GA, let me know. We could possibly hang out a bit. I don't have a car, so I am quite restricted geographically. It's even possible I could make it up there, sometime. Lots to do in the Old North State.

 

At any rate, taking a little vacation is exactly what you need. Go see your sister, enjoy some time in Texas. You'll be feeling better. I think you should also know that we all love you, too.

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Ah, I'm sure he didn't mean anything by it. Just trying to cheer you up. About us being imaginary... I assure you that I am a flesh-and-blood human being. I can relate to your hermit cave, btw, a coworker brought up the fact that I'm something of a recluse. He's right. Almost every time I've had anyone over, I've felt the need to apologize repeatedly over the state of the place. I'm not a very neat and tidy type of person, and I don't like having company often.

 

If you're ever gonna be in GA, let me know. We could possibly hang out a bit. I don't have a car, so I am quite restricted geographically. It's even possible I could make it up there, sometime. Lots to do in the Old North State.

 

At any rate, taking a little vacation is exactly what you need. Go see your sister, enjoy some time in Texas. You'll be feeling better. I think you should also know that we all love you, too.

You are welcome in my home, dude. I know Wez didn't mean it.

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Maybe you'll like this news article about noisy cars

 

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x_JtoW7GrdY]YouTube- Bubb Rubb & Lil' Sis - Whistles Go Woo (Original)[/ame]

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My sister used to watch Fraggle Rock all the time. Believe it or not, she got back into it at 23 years old. Imagine a 23 year old woman singing the Fraggle Rock theme song. Just too funny.

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I know Wez didn't mean it.

 

 

Would it have been more convincing if I said you really, really suck?

 

I'm a novice at this whole humiliation thing. :dunno:

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At least I got a :D with my p***a f**king PC thread.

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Would it have been more convincing if I said you really, really suck?

 

I'm a novice at this whole humiliation thing. :dunno:

I dunno. Surprize me.

 

At least I got a :D with my p***a f**king PC thread.
Yeah...

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